How to End The Sibling Fight of Who Goes First
A sign of a healthy culture is the ability to work as a team, communicate well, and get along.
No matter whether your kids are toddlers or teens, deciding who goes first for almost EVERYTHING has the potential to be a disaster. I don't know what's so special about being first, but it seems it's what most kids want to be.
I have seen my kids argue about being first to take a bath, talk at dinner, and even put sunscreen on at the pool. Not only that, they would argue over who gets to pick the music and who gets stuck sitting in the dreaded middle seat of the back seat. At first, birth order worked to decide who got to do things first, but as they got older, it didn't anymore.
My kids whined, "Mom, it's my turn; she got to do it last time." I'll have to be honest with you, I was horrible at keeping track, and I often let the child that happen to be on my good side that day get their way. The kids could see right through this, and eventually, keeping track in my head became too hard to maintain.
Then we found a solution!
We created a plan that would determine who got to go or choose first.
It is so simple but so brilliant! It immediately eliminated the bickering and little voices moaning, "Mom, she always gets to go first." It is a strategy that we could implement quickly, and it is so easy to maintain.
These tricks have helped me end the sibling fight of who goes first.
If you have two kids, Assign odd and even days of the calendar to each.
More than two? Assign each child a day of the week. My oldest daughter is first on Monday and Thursday. My middle girl on Tuesday and Friday. My son on Wednesday and Saturday. Sunday is the parent's choice. This order will help you designate who goes 2nd and 3rd too! For example, on a Monday, Ava gets to go first. Elie goes second, and Aaron goes third. Then on a Tuesday, Elie goes first, followed by Aaron later Ava.
More children? Have a straight rotation, and keep track of it on a calendar.
You can do one of these methods, or a combination of both. For example, we use the day of the week method for our children; however, my teen girls use odd and even days to determine who sits in the front seat of the car. (My son is too young to ride up front.)
Keep in mind, all days are not created equal. Weekdays are very different than weekend days, so you may need to change up the schedule now and then.
In the beginning, it is helpful to print out a calendar with assigned dates to remember which day is whose. But don't worry, it won't take long for the kids to know which day is theirs.
Just like with most systems that you put in place, it will take practice. But once it's in place, it will eliminate a considerable number of arguments that siblings have.
Watch this Family Hack on IGTV HERE
Download this Resource
You can do the steps I mentioned earlier on your own; however, If you need a little help getting started with this hack, you can download a resource have created that will help.
It includes a list of suggested chores for kids of all ages, plus an activity your kids can do to figure out what gets done and by whom. When you sign up for it, you'll get this plus access to all the previous family culture hacks videos and resources.